Whomsoever I've cured I've sickened now; whomsoever I've cradled I've put you down...

Does it ever seem to any of you that the ones you care about the most are the ones you dissappoint the worst? It's that way with me. I hurt the ones around me, and it seems that no matter how hard I try to stop it, it always happens. It has always been that way, and I don't know how to change it. God knows I'd sell what's left of my soul if I could change that.

I've ruined so many wonderful things in my life because of the way I am. I've left so many people behind just to satifly the damned monster called pride. The worst is when I care about the person, and I can't show it... I push people away when I want them to be close, I leave when I need them the most, and I turn away from people when I love them the most all because of who I am. And it's getting worse, or at least it seems that way. I know that there is something more out there, something that I'm missing but I can't find it because I'm a slave to my nature.

I have things I want to say... even now I have something pressing on my mind that's tearing me apart because of this very thing I've been talking about... but I can't say them. I can't admit to it even though I want to because... I'm me.

If I had one wish, one thing I could change I know what it would be... but if one thing is for certain, if history has taught me anything, it's that second chances are rare. Once you screw up, it's near impossible to change... and I blew it.

Whatsoever I've feared has
Come to life
Whatsoever I've fought off
Became my life
Just when every day
Seemed to greet me with a smile
Sunspots have faded
And now I'm doing time
Now I'm doing time

Cause I fell on
Black days
I fell on
Black days

Whomsoever I've cured
I've sickened now
Whomsoever I've cradled
I've put you down
I'm a search-light soul they say
But I can't see it in the night
I'm only faking
When I get it right
When I get it right

Cause I fell on
Black days
I fell on
Black days

How would I know
That this could be my fate
How would I know
That this could be my fate

So what you wanted to see good
Has made you blind
And what you wanted to be yours
Has made it mine
So don't you lock up something
That you wanted to see fly
Hands are for shaking
No not tying
No not tying

I sure don't mind a change
I sure don't mind a change
Yeah, I sure don't mind
I sure don't mind a change
I sure don't mind a change

But I fell on black days
I fell on black days

How would I know
That this could be my fate
How would I know
That this could be my fate
How would I know
That this could be my fate
How would I know
That this could be my fate
I sure don't mind a change

-Chris Cornell; Soundgarden
Fell on Black Days